Martha Jones.

She's alright, isn't she?

I didn't think that they would be able to find a suitable replacement to Rose Tyler, but this new girl is okay.

She's very different, which is good, as it makes a refreshing change.

But I always approach each new companion with a tinge of bitterness because I feel that I ought to be the Doctor's new assistant. I have all the necessary features - an interest in space, super-intelligence, amazing good looks. I'm the perfect candidate.

Alas, the TARDIS has never landed in my garden. The Doctor hasn't had to destroy any large threatening aliens roaming around my town. We have never met, so he has had no oppotunity to whisk me away to another galaxy as his trusty companion.

*sigh*

...

...

Wait...

What's that noise coming from the garden?

And who is that man walking across my lawn?

Could it be...?

...

Nope, wait, it's just a burglar.

*sigh*